... i seem to attract weird people. for some reason, people feel it's okay to come up to me and talk about random stuff. of course, it's never the super hot girl.
"everyone has that happen". well, let me give examples.
... once i was a convention or some show or something walking around, looking at the exhibits. there was an older man who was mentally retarded (is there a p.c. term that i'm not aware of? my intention is not to offend here) individual who passed by and said "hi" and i returned his greeting. i wander around the room and bump into him a few minutes later. he says "hi" again, and then reaches out, takes my glasses off my head, spits on them, and then starts cleaning them with his tee-shirt. apparently this is something he likes to do for all of his friends.
what else can you do but politely thank him, take your glasses, excuse yourself and run for the nearest sink to wash them off?
... today i go into the bathroom at work. my contact lens is driving me crazy and i figure it's time to pop the sucker out, clean it and put it back in. there's another guy in there and he turns, says "have you ever noticed how when you have asparagus the day before, the next day your urine smells like asparagus?" "uh, no. never noticed that." "do you eat much asparagus?" "uh, no. probably not as much as i should." "well, it's a scientific fact. next time you eat asparagus, remember to smell your urine the next day. it'll freak you out!" "huh, thanks for the tip"
and now, hopefully, these will haunt your sleepless nights as well. be glad i didn't share the story of the toothless stripper.
5 comments:
My best friend once told me "You find the weirest person in the room and make them your friend." I said "And, what does that say about you, considering you are my best friend."
The term is mentally impaired.
And, it's true about asparagus....and it also effects your....well, let's just say that I'm sure your girlfriend is happy that you don't eat much asparagus...
:)
Yes, asparagus will do that.
I also have weird person radar. It was the worst when I worked in retail; invariably, the strangest customer would always find me. People with disabilities (even MORE pc, as they are always a PERSON first, then a person with a disability) always find me as well, but since I work in special education, I just chalk it up to an extension of the work day and move on.
Sean, have I ever told you that I'm a weirdness magnet? It sounds like you are one too. Not even my most meanest, angriest face will deter those drawn to me.
And no, my mean face does not make me look "cute and approachable." I think.
Grrr....
I own a big rig truck garage. Believe me, some of the bubba's that come in are priceless.
BTW, the asparagus thing, so wierd but true :)
This happens to me all the time. I must have a friendly face or soemthing. Time to work on a scowl.
Yeah. see my livejournal post about the girl with the Cure/Robert Smith picture. Random.
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